Friday, 28 October 2016

He cheated with my best friend



"So we were both dating and as usual, i was cruising in deep love. I have dated this guy for three years and everything totally seemed to be fine. I'm a student and he is working in an engineering firm where he is handsomely paid. He is everything, he takes me around the place and buys me heaven and earth, in fact I am literally married, the difference is just that we are living apart. He met with my friends and really flowed with them, I was happy that that he could communicate with my friends and we became one big and happy family. 

This guy started to go out with  two of my friends behind my back, one at a time. They went clubbing, movies, swimming, shopping and banging everywhere. I was still there feeling like he was a faithful God sent and kept on loving him all over. Unfortunately, he had a quarrel with one of my friends and she came to report and opened up on what has been going on, i asked him and he denied even after I had seen pictures of all their outing. What really should I do, confront my friend angrily? Confront him? Confront both? let it sly? break up with him? stay in the relationship? I'm really confused!! I know I shouldn't be messaging you this but it seems like you know stuff about relationships. Please post it on the blog so I can get other opinions on what to do. I just hope people can comment." - Anonymous 

Thank you so much for sending this to me, I'm glad I could be of help in any little way.
I totally get how it feels to be cheated on and also how it feels when the person in question is denying but first you have to understand that there is no call for a drastic decision while you are still hurting. You have to overcome the hurt before you can actually decide what to do.

If you let it sly, you are only procrastinating the confrontation cause the wound will remain fresh and you sincerely wouldn't be comfortable. So letting it sly is not an option.

Confront him about it and show the pictures to him, let him know exactly how you feel about it. Don't mise your words, be clear and simple.

Confront both of your friends as well because if they didn't have a misunderstanding, they wouldn't have told you. Tell them how you feel about their actions. Exactly how you feel.

Take time off and treat your wound. Cry if you feel like, go out, clear your head, do whatever makes you happy. It could be for a day, a week or a month it depends on you. Just go take enough time to heal (You don't have to pay him back)

The time off would actually make you figure out if you want to stay or not and it would make you see things clearer. I really can't tell you if you should quit or not. There is no general ideal way to treating this kinda case, you have to figure out for yourself by first healing from your wound. 

I'd like more suggestions on the comment box. Thanks


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